"i told you so's"

don't know what you call it, but everything seems to jerk down on me like i'm some kind of irresponsible person. it's like the "i told you so's" have been repeated so much that i'm starting to sink and believe that i did so. i don't believe i've ever let them have a reason to believe i could be the person i'm not. it's just tiring when everytime you do something, you have to constantly remind someone that "it's okay" and this and that. why not just believe me, period?

i'm quite a sensitive person. i guess that's the most stereotypical girl atout you'll find in me. hence eventhough you back up your "i told you so" with "but no, do it anyway.. i just want you to think of it twice before blablabla"-- i get confused. On one hand, i know that deep down inside you hope & pray i don't; on the other, i feel like i'm being dictated and mistrust. it's like being on a two-way street while knowing neither is right.

i guess everything comes back to myself. they say if you keep having issues then take a look at yourself first. true, from the religious aspect, i haven't spoken to god since... well, a long time. usually when all else goes wrong, i can still close my eyes in peace at night. curse the world to sleep and pray that a brand new day awaits the following sunrise. this hasn't been the case for some time now.

CPE (continued)

I take it you've all heard about the mess happening in France? Well, ever since the President of the Republic, Jacques Chirac, promulgated the CPE law (i.e. last night), things have gotten a tid bit worse. These people are everywhere now, although it hasn't particularly nailled terror on me to something as extreme as not leaving my appartment.

Chirac's modification of the law by reducing the "probation period" from 2 to 1 year; and the chance for the young to be given reasons upon dismissal; seem to be undermined completely by the fact that it has been promulgated. Apparently last night we had "une nuit de colere" after the President's long-awaited course of action speech. Wow, Tuesday's gonna be fun.

A few days back when French Prime Minister, Dominique de Villepin, wanted to have an open discussion with the unions, the student unions refused, saying they can't have real talks when the Prime Minister already has it craned in his brain that the CPE must apply before actual discussion. Now with the President's intervention of modifying the law, and the protests that are due to be nation-wide this Tuesday (4th April); now who has what already craned in the brain?

What bothers me is the fact they compare what's happening now with what happened in May 1968. During this period, the French government was close to collapse, with general De Gaulle in charge. It started with series of innocent student strikes followed by confrontations with the national police. Okay, that might look similar to today's case. But the reason for protests is just different. Quoting from a debate I saw on TV, "En mai 1968, les etudiants voulaient que le monde change" (in May 1968, the students wanted the world to change). Whereas today, French students are afraid of changes. Afraid of competition in jobs. One term that they repeat over and over again in the media is the treatment of people like "kleenex" (i.e. tissue).
But honestly, which bosses in their right minds would sack anyone if he/she is doing the job well??

May 1968 wasn't uniquely France's event, but students' protests vibrated throughout the world. What did they want? Better methods of education and along the lines of sexual freedom. Today's protests are not even half worth 68's.