Back to Reality...

A title, appropriate to my blog's content of the day: "Back to Reality." Yes, my flight is tonight, merely saying that it's less than 6 hours from now. My emotions.. a mix. I'm surprised at myself for taking it rather well this time, unlike when my parents left me. I guess the person that is leaving is always more at ease, if there is any ease that is. This time, the goodbye is unsure.. unlike February's,, I was always at the constant cheer of thinking that I'll be seeing them in June. This time.. there is no promises. I don't know when I'll be seeing them again, nor do they.


Now the reason I have in choosing the word "reality" has something to do with my out-of-this-world period that I've enjoyed over the last 2 months. It was like I literally turned back in time, there was only the tiniest worries for all things. I know that there are my parents in whom I can count on worrying for things and constantly solving them... I've been pampered with the thought that I have them protecting me. But now... I feel so forever more tiny, so vulnerable. One thing goes wrong. That's it.


In times like this is when I know and able to judge my level of independence. I know I have to make it... and I have quite a bit of certainty that it will after weeks go by. But the final crucial step is about to come.. leaving that door and stepping my foot on that plane. That is when matters really count. That will be when my brain detects all the uncertainty from all organs covered by my flesh. That will be the goodbye.
Whatever the future has to offer me, I will embrace.